do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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