a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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