It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
My first STD was from a foam party
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
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