Swine flu. Run for my life!
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
