Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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