hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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