Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
