you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
