But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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