we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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