plz talk dirty to me
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
