I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
