Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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