I only kidnapped one of them. chill
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
