if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
