You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
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I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
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I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
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