i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize