He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
