too bad you live with your parents still
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
