So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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