and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
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My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
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He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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