i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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