She's JV to your varsity
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
operation harelip BJ is a go
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize