So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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