Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
