There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
