this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
