Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize