We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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