I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
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We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
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I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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