Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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