Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize