I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
