Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize