No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
