May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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