i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize