K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize
