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I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
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