Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
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I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize