I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
