your thong is hanging out like whoa
Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
he shaved USA in his pubs
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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