Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
We had sex on a dog bed..
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
