How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
