I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
