Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
