Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
