i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
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