Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
