Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize