did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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